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That laurel and hardy crack me up
That william shatner’s last album is one of my favourites
That I secretly fancy simon cowell a tiny little bit
That I have a note on my fridge that says “kill richard and therese” and another one underneath that says “yes, wring their scrawny little necks”
That I have an etsy shop CLICK AND VISIT!
That I have an alter-ego CLICK AND VISIT!
That we call the 210 ‘the poor bus’
That we have a running score for university challenge and ben’s probably winning by a small margin
That when I’m on the computer, I play masquerade by the carpenters over and over again and sing very loudly into a pen
That I hate see-saws
That I collect vintage sewing patterns and vintage teacups
That I’m a slow reader mainly due to an OCD, which requires that I take in every word absolutely thoroughly
That I have a pathological fear of lateness, which manifests itself in recurring dreams
That I have a pathological fear of parties (the grown-up kind not children’s…although, that’s another story).
That I am fiercely competitive in a passive aggressive way.
Who are Richard and Therese and why do you want to kill them?
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When John and I watch university challenge I answer every question 'Potato', because in the law of averages one day that will be the right answer.
ReplyDeleteRichard and therese are my upstairs neighbours...and they are even more evil than cats!
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cats are not evil, they just know who doesn't like them.
ReplyDeleteme and auntie dory...and sally, apart from all bee's cats which are cuuute!
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I want to know more about your neighbours. What have they done? I hate their names.
ReplyDeleteyes, their names say it all. i mean there's nothing much wrong with 'richard' as a name. but richard and therese...bbrrr!
ReplyDeletethey are just a couple of bitter, moaning, alcoholic, chain smoking old queens. if we say we want to do something, they say 'but what about THIS and THIS and THIS!'
Why have i never heard about your neighbours before? it's most interesting...and what's wrong with seesaws?
ReplyDeletei'm afaid if heights miss X. i know see-saws don't go very high but i always think i'm gonna be tipped over the top. especially when the other person is really boinging up and down.
ReplyDeleteWhan can we meet Richard and Therese? They sound great!
ReplyDeleteinstead of meeting them, why not help us think up ways to damage their property without them knowing it's us.
ReplyDeletePour water through the letter box then push some cress seeds through. Always amusing. Or my fave, put some dog or baby poo in a brown paper bag, set it on fire, knock on their door then run and hide and laugh as they open the door and stamp hard on the bag to put the fire out and get covered in poo.
ReplyDeletethe poo one is genius. but since we share a commom hallway, and would therefore have access to their door, they may know it's us. especially as they already think we're childish and treat us like we're 12.
ReplyDeleteMmmm, true. I'll have a think....
ReplyDeletei once left poo on a friend's doorstep as he'd stood me and another friend up.....
ReplyDeletei'm going to poo on their car tonight. they'l never know it's us!
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auntie dory, that's not true.
ReplyDeleteENOUGH OF THE POO!
My grandmother told me the story about the-little-girl-who-broke-her-jaw-by-standing-too-close-to-a-seesaw so often that I am convinced I saw it happen.
ReplyDeleteI don't hate seesaws though.
Grandmothers always have stories like that, mine told me if you picked your nose it fell off. And there was the story of the little girl who used to chew her hair, swallowed some and a fur ball grew in her tummy. I pick my nose and chew my hair.
ReplyDeleteClaire, your website is lovely.
What is a widescreen centre and why do you have to call it?
ReplyDeleteit's a film-making shop in marylebone. i have to call them because kodak have closed their super-8 processing centre and i need to know how i can get my film processed now.
ReplyDeleteMany thanks.
ReplyDeletethe poo story is true
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